motherhood – scrunchymomz

Well hello!

Just needed to write something to fill in the void that has been my blog since my last post.

I actually have two and a half drafts saved, one of which I keep going back to and slowly editing. But I keep leaving it as a draft because I can’t get myself to be happy with it.

It’s also kind of hard to take time to write when I’m constantly having to stop one or both of the boys from getting into something.

And I’ll be honest, I’ve been feeling a bit burnt out lately. Mikey has been going through a sleep regression, Vinny and I have been doing a little better about navigating the terrible two’s, but when he has bad days, they’re BAD, both of our cars (one of which is new to us and we got it for more car space) have been having issues, I’ve been falling behind on the house, I’ve been falling behind on writing requests and projects, and the holidays and all that goes with it is just the cherry on top of my mental flat-lined-ness.

(I wrote a post last year on how not to stress around the holidays, so that’s not getting to me too too much, but it’s just that last little detail that needs attention, you know?)

On top of that, I’ve just been feeling a little discouraged when it comes to the blog. I hate to say it, but I’ve been kind of sad about how small my following still is on here and my social media. I feel sort of like I’ve flopped, I guess.

I know it can take a while to get a following, if you get one at all, and it takes a lot of work to do it the right way. And I know this is a saturated market these days, so I totally get that it’s easy to get lost in the crowd.

Sometimes I worry about my skills as a writer. I often feel like I’ve lost my touch after having kids. I worry that people don’t like what I put out, and that I’m no good at this, so sometimes I either get too self conscious or I just think, “why bother?”

If I could have ice cream and sugary drinks rn 😂😭

But then I think about those times I have gotten random comments on some of my older posts. The ones who have thanked me for writing about a certain topic, the ones who have told me that I have helped them through a struggle, the ones who have shared a laugh with me at some of the pratfalls of parenting.

Then I think about all of the times I’ve searched something on Pinterest and how that search led me to a blog post that got me through something, or gave me instructions for a fun activity for my boys, or just made me realize that I’m not alone in some things. I don’t think I commented on many of those, let alone thought to follow them at the time, so they have no way of knowing that they helped me–but they did.

So maybe, even though I don’t have many followers to show for it, I have made a difference for some Moms out there. Even if I feel like I’m not so good at this.

I started this blog for a few reasons: for fun, to help me through postpartum depression, to make sense of my experiences, to keep up my writing skills out of work, and to help other Moms–particularly other Scrunchy Moms like me!

The Moms who use screen time, but don’t like GMO’s. The Moms who only buy sustainably sourced clothes, but who will get a happy meal once in a while because it’s been a day. The Moms who cloth diaper, but formula feed. And all the other Moms in between.

Somewhere along the way I lost sight of that and got wrapped up in the Influencer rat race.

I know that God put a knack and interest in writing in my heart for a reason. I’m meant to do something with this to carry out His work. So, if I can help even just one Mom with something every few posts, or help ease one Mom’s loneliness, or just give one Mom a laugh, then what does it matter what number the subscribers list reflects?

I know I’ll probably get discouraged again, it’s only natural. But I will continue to post blogs, update my Instagram stories, and put up Instagram shoots even if it’s just for myself and my friends and family. Because it’s something I’m doing for me, and I think that’s important to have as a Mom.

These little guys are a handful, but they keep my heart full 💕

Anyways, thanks for reading! I’ll have a real post up within this next week, hopefully!

Until next time, take care!!

Hello, my Gals,

It’s been a hot minute. I thought I’d do something different.

There’s a lot of Mom/Parenting parodies of songs out there, and more often than not I cringe at them, unless they’re done really well and I personally find them #relatable

I’ve been thinking about the Bennet Brauer rants that Chris Farley (God rest his soul) did way back in the day when Saturday Night Live was really a thing, and a good one at that.

Most of you might not get what I’m talking about. Truthfully, I barely remember it, myself. But it’s one of his most Iconic roles, and always one that is highlighted when people remember him.

And to be honest, the videos already almost #relatable in their original form.

Just so you’ll get the gist of what I’m saying below, at least watch the first one. Or both, if you want to (Or neither, I can’t tell you what to do, I’m not your Mom). Farley’s performances are hilarious!

Part 1 (Skip to 1:45)

Part 2

Part 3 (This particular rant is the most referenced, and yet I can only find the written quote for it online! But you may have seen this one in passing if you’ve seen a Chris Farley tribute)

Ok well, without further ado, here’s my Mom parody of the Iconic Bennet Brauer rants:

Part 1

That’s right, ya grrl, m3lz here with a parody.

Not quite what you’re used to, perhaps (or maybe you know it all too well)?

Not a tidy picture, is it?

I guess in today’s filtered society, apparently Jane Q. Reader is only comfortable getting her opinions from a Barbie Doll.

Well, maybe I’m not an “Insta Model,” or a “MILF.” Maybe my house isn’t “Aesthetic,” or even “Presentable.” Maybe my home decor isn’t, “Pleasing to the eye.”

Maybe I’m not “Witty” without a heart-attack-inducing amount of caffeine. I have no “Charm” or “Appeal.” My Mom Brain as made me not “Smart” or even “Average.”

My toddler doesn’t “Pee in the potty (yet).”

I’m not always “Clean.” I don’t always “Smell good.” My nails aren’t “Polished,” or “Clipped.”

I have nothing “Interesting to say (outside of what Vinny said the other day and how Mikey smiled again for the 5000th time and it’s still not geting old and never will).”

I guess I don’t “Play the game.” (Btw you all just lost The Game)

When my toddler eats, he doesn’t always “Use silverware” or “Wipe his own face.” I don’t always “Wash the table or his eating station afterwards,” or even “The next day.”

So, I guess I just don’t “Fit the mold.” And if that’s the case, I’ll just step back and I’m sure John and Jane Doe can go back to enjoying the endless parade of parenting bloggers who don’t “Make people cringe.”

Thanks, that’s all for now, Kevin.

Part 2

That’s right, ya grrl m3lz, back with another parody.

Thought you’d seen the last of old Scrunchymomz, perhaps? Thought the internet algorithm would have sent me and my “Low like and view ratios” on a slow Uber to Portland?

^Other Mom Bloggers/Vloggers/Influencers…

…&& ya grrl. #nofilter

Well, maybe I don’t “Look the part.” I’m not “Svelte.” I don’t “Look comfortable on camera.” I’m not “Savvy.” I don’t “Understand what’s going on in the News.”

I’m not “Likeable.” I don’t “Get along with people.” When I go to Aldi, I don’t “make eye contact.”

I guess I don’t “Fit the mold.” I don’t “Wear the latest clothes,” or even ones that don’t “Reek like sour cream and onion.” I don’t “Change my bra.”

I’m not “Slim Thicc.” I don’t have “Nice bobs.” I don’t “Exercise.” And when I do sweat (From chasing my toddler around and trying to pick up in his wake whilst attending to a newborn), I don’t always “Shower.”

My house is not “Sparkling,” I don’t “Clean the area between the fridge and counter.”

We’re supposed to clean walls now??? Who has time for that??? #aintnobody

But, for the time being, I guess the “Algorithm” is opting for my approach until Jane Reader tells them she’d rather get her two cents from Mom bloggers who haven’t “Made babies cry,” or “Drink Trader Joe’s moscato straight from the bottle,” or, “Leave old dried up deodorant cakes under their arm for weeks at a time…”

*The part where Chris Farley is lifted by wires*

I’m crying! I’m crying, holy Schnikes!

I have a weight/body image problem, can’t they fix me??

Back to you, Kevin!!!1!!11!!

Part 3

That’s right, m3lz again with yet another parody!

Didn’t think the algorightm would have me back, perhaps? Thought they’d have my booty replaced by one of them Victoria’s Secret mannequins?

Well, maybe I’m not “The norm.” I’m not “Camera friendly.” I don’t “Wear (or have) clothes that fit me.” I’m not a “Heart-Eyes react.”

I haven’t had “sex with my husband in at least a good month or two.” I don’t remember “How that works.”

I don’t “Fall in line.” I’m not “Hygienic,” I don’t “Wipe down toys after every use.”

Crumbs wiped to the side so he could play with homemade play-dough LoL

I lack “Style.” I don’t have “Self-esteem.” I have no “Charisma.” I don’t “Own a toothbrush that wasn’t purchased after 2017.”

I don’t “Let my acne scars heal.” I can’t, “Reach all parts of my body.” When I sleep I, “Sweat profusely.”

But I guess the powers that be will keep sending me emails on how to improve my site until Jane K. Reader starts to swipe left and say ‘Thank u next,’ so they can go back to Mom bloggers who don’t “Frighten children,” who don’t “Eat expired cold cuts,” who don’t, “Pop their whiteheads with a safety pin they used to wear in their sweatpants back in high school.”

Thank you, Kevin.

Yeah, so that’s it. Basically #Abigmood when it comes to my experiences in motherhood.

Obviously I’m far from perfect. Obviously, that’s true for the majority of us. And what we see from those other Moms on Instagram and YouTube or Netflix isn’t always what you get. I know without a doubt they all have their struggles, too. No matter how glamorous they appear.

I can make myself seem “Glowed Up,” too.

I can make myself look “Glowed Up,” too!

But I do my best every day. And some days, I don’t do as well as I thought I could. But all days, it’s entirely the best thing I’ve ever done.

How have your adventures in motherhood gone? Is it what you thought it would be? What would you change, if you could? How do you hope to grow in the years to come?

Thanks for reading, my gals! 😘😘

👀If you’re new here, and this content or any of my upcoming content interests you, make sure you add your email and follow so you don’t miss any updates! 😁😁 And if you’re already following, thank you and bless your heart and soul! 🙏🏼🥰🤗

📋 Upcoming Content: My (Stay-At-Home) Mom Guilt, My Son’s “Home-Nursery-School Curriculum,” and Two Vs. One: How To Survive 2 Under 2

Tag: motherhood

A Rant Most Of You Millenial Moms Might Get

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